Division and conflict- what does the Bible say about how to handle it?

Sadly, there are, at times, struggles among Christians. I wish it were not so, and I believe it grieves the heart of God to see His church fighting among themselves. In considering a recent reading of James 3 and 4, I was led to write this as a means to promote love for one another. Sometimes, to see how we ought to act towards each other, we have to look at the down side of human nature, and how it hinders the effectiveness of the Holy Spirit in our own lives. I pray that we all learn to practice these Biblical principles should conflicts come our way. 


In the matter of division and conflict among believers, we must be careful how we handle ourselves. We ought not to make rush judgments, and not knowing the whole story, we ought to make no judgment at all. If all believers held to the Biblical principles on this matter, we would see much less disunity in the body of Christ. Seeing the example of our Savior, we ought to offer mercy to a weaker brother or sister. Often, misunderstandings are the source of such conflict. Communication is one key to keeping unity, one that is not a strong point in many 21st century churches.

Considering the following passage in Matthew, I would ask if there has been a sin/trespass, or just a misunderstanding that is causing the conflict. Only those involved can discern the truth of their own motives, so let us see what Scripture says on the subject. The Bible standard here should govern our way as believers whose primary goal is to glorify God in all we do and say.

Matthew 18:15 "Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican. 18 Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. 19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven. 20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them. 21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven. "

Note in this passage that Peter did not say that the brother even repented. He asks how often should he forgive a brother that sins against him. We can forgive a brother, even when he is not repentant. This works wonders in our hearts, and is the example Jesus lived out in His own times of trials and conflict. In the matter of salvation, God offers forgiveness, but one does not gain the personal benefit of forgiveness until we ask for it.  Romans 5 tells us that Christ died for the ungodly, while we were dead in our sins, and forgiveness was offered long before repentance was made.

James 3:13 "Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. 14 But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. 15 This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. 16 For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. 17 But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. 18 And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace." 

If we can not honestly look at our own lives and actions, and see purity, peace, gentleness, mercy, then even if we feel ourselves to be right, we are still wrong in our motivations. God's wisdom is just what it says here in verse 17, and verse 18 promises us that peace will be the result as we walk in righteousness.

The following verses in James 4 tell us where conflicts and quarrels among us start. Simply from God's Word, we find the root causes. We can not be interested in our own glory, or taking power for ourselves. We must submit one to another in love, serving one another, and especially not to drag private sins out for the world to see. 

There is a place, after certain steps are taken, to bring sin that is unrepented of before the local church, only for the purpose of reconciliation, but never for the world to see. The names of Jesus Christ and God the Father are taken in vain too often, let us not give the unsaved world any reason to bad mouth His people. Truly, even in conflict, are we not brothers? Will we not share eternity in God's presence together? There will be no conflict there, so let us learn how to treat each other.

1Peter 2:19 "For this is thankworthy, if a man for conscience toward God endure grief, suffering wrongfully. 20 For what glory is it, if, when ye be buffeted for your faults, ye shall take it patiently? but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God. 21 For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps: 22 Who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth: 23 Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously: 24 Who his own self bare our sins in his own body on the tree, that we, being dead to sins, should live unto righteousness: by whose stripes ye were healed. 25 For ye were as sheep going astray; but are now returned unto the Shepherd and Bishop of your souls"

So, what if you are right before God, and still suffer wrongfully? God gives us the answer in this passage. We have our example in Christ Jesus, who did not sin, did not revile in return, did not threaten, and committed His ways to the Father, who is the ultimate Judge. We tend to go astray, and find our own way to deal with persecution, even for righteousness sake. Still, we are commanded to follow in His steps, something not accomplished by man's strength, but only as we walk in the spirit. James 1:19-20 remind us that our anger and wrath accomplishes nothing for the Lord. 

In a recent conversation during jail ministry, I was told that gaining revenge felt good at the time, but the lasting consequences were not pleasurable. It is the same way in the body of Christ. We might, by our own efforts, be able to convince others to be on our side, speaking ill of a brother or sister. We may assault their character, question their motives, and bring them down. But, what does this accomplish, but to divide the body of Christ? Surely, this is not the Christian way.

If we have our eyes on getting revenge and making ourselves look good, we miss the fact that the testimony of an entire local church can be destroyed by our desire to be seen as on the right side, not considering that another blood bought son of God is being dragged through the mud for our benefit. We must be careful how we treat those around us, and how in turn we treat the Lord Jesus Himself.

1Corinthians 6:7 Now therefore there is utterly a fault among you, because ye go to law one with another. Why do ye not rather take wrong? why do ye not rather suffer yourselves to be defrauded? 8 Nay, ye do wrong, and defraud, and that your brethren. 9 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, 10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God. 

At times, it is better to take the hit, to be wronged, and keep the name of Jesus Christ out from among the courts and especially the court of public opinion. The world is watching. One of Satan's best tools is to cause strife among Christians, showing their error to the world, and hardening a soul that may be softened to the Spirit's call to come to Christ. If we were to take the time to look at all the past sins in our own lives, we would be reminded that much grace and mercy has been extended toward us by brothers and sisters, and more than that, by a holy, righteous, and just God that has taken our sin-stained rags and given us robes of pure white. Jesus says in Matthew 6 that if we will not forgive others, we will not be forgiven. Let us be careful not to harbor bitterness in our hearts or to have a critical spirit.

1Corinthians 6:19 What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? 20 For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. 

We, as Christians, are not our own, but each members of the universal body of Christ. Let us act like it, remembering how much we hurt our Creator God by our own sin. In Christ, we are a temple of God's Holy Spirit, and should reflect the glory of God in all we do and say.  

If we were to look at the situation through God's eyes, could we honestly say that we are not at fault in any way. If there is fault in our lives concerning this, let us reconcile ourselves to the Lord, and seek His face in how to deal with the problems that come our way. 

When we see these Scriptural guidelines, and examine ourselves, I think we will learn more and more to give grace, as none of us are not perfect. I know I am far from perfect, and have learned some of the lessons here the hard way. Some times I have had to repent privately, sometimes publicly. At other times I have had a brother come to me, broken before the Lord and asking forgiveness of me, and at those times we should do nothing less than rejoice that the name of Jesus Christ is exalted, because His children are learning more and more to bear with one another. 

The body is built up in this way, and in time, all wounds can be healed. You do not have to wait for the other party to do the right thing, and we must not harbor bitterness. You can be the one to step up to the plate, and follow the example of Christ. As much as it depends on you, be at peace with all men. Even those who treat you wrong. After all, we are the body of Christ.

Used up for Jesus- a call to all believers

To listen to the message, just click on the blog title.
I just listened to this message by a brother in Richmond, Kentucky. I was challenged to continue to give more and more (more than all?) for the Lord Jesus and His kingdom. Just a short message, but a great discussion starter for us all.

Josiah Morrison is just 21 years old and a former Good News On the Move team member. This brother has a heart for reaching the lost for the Savior and encouraging believers in their service to the Lord. He is in charge of follow-up for the work of the Lord in Richmond, Kentucky, a good friend, and a blessing to my heart. I pray that we continue to meet young men and women dedicated completely to God.

I hope this message encourages you to start each day with an eye on eternity. I would also recommend the book he mentions "The Disciples Manual" by William MacDonald. I am reading this book right now, and feel it is a must read for all believers, especially new Christians and young adults.

I have received many emails asking for some of the materials I have produced over the years. This blog is searchable and contains much of what I have written, and I have recently started using tags on the articles here to make them more accessible and easier to find.


We also use Google Docs and are working on publishing materials such as gospel tracts, training materials, song visuals, and other items that we (Mark and Nathaniel) have put together to help and equip the body of Christ. We want to continue to connect with Christians worldwide, and have found the medium of the internet to be a valuable tool.


Feel free to email me at cowperthwaitefamily@gmail.com with any questions or suggestions.


Some articles can also be found on Google Knols and I will be putting more articles up as they are written.


Thank you for taking time to read these items, I pray that they will be encouraging, challenging, and mostly that God is glorified in all things.

Be Hospitable one to another- by Mark and Sara

What is hospitality?

In recent years, we have taken a good hard look at our own lives, searching God's Word for examples, and then put into practice those things we found one by one. We still have a long ways to go, but here are some of our thoughts on the subject.

I would like to preface this study with a thought: many are on limited budgets, and have homes that they consider "not good enough to entertain in" We have never been to a home that we didn't find the accomodations or food to be adequate. If you can only afford a bowl of rice and water, then serve that. It is not about the food, but the time spent together, and the fellowship of sharing what we have with others in the Lord.

Our family has had many folks to our home(a camper trailer of about 275 square feet) with families as large as 7 plus our family of 5(soon to be 6), so don't think the size or condition of your home is not good enough. Honesty and transparency in our dealing with one another is a necessary first step to getting to truly know each other and be able to help. We are family, as believers in Christ, united in spirit, and we desire to see the body of Christ worldwide unified, caring for one another, and glorifying God in every area of our lives.

I pray that the intent of this teaching is evident, not to judge or point fingers, nor to boast in anything. We are all in this together, and we all have much to change in our lives to please the Lord. May we all be unified in the love of God, and the fellowship we have in Christ Jesus our Savior and Lord, giving all thanks and praise where it is due, to Him alone who is worthy.

Dictionary definition-

HOS'PITABLE, a. [L. hospitalis, from hospes, a guest.]

1. Receiving and entertaining strangers,with kindness and without reward; kind to strangers and guests; disposed to treat guests with generous kindness; as a hospitable man.

2. Proceeding from or indicating kindness to guests; manifesting generosity; as a hospitable table; hospitable rites.

3. Inviting to strangers; offering kind reception; indicating hospitality.

Biblical references -

Romans. 12:13- (in regards to one another)Contributing to the needs of the saints, practicing hospitality.

Practically, this speaks to serving a need inside the body. Maybe inviting someone to your home(someone who does not have the means to eat well, or prepare food due to loss of home), taking a meal to a family in need(injury, death in family, baby born, etc). This is based on filling a practical need, and also of meals being a great time to talk, fellowship, and after eating to pray and read God's Word together. This type of encouragement is seriously lacking in most of our lives. True fellowship is not about the regular meetings of the church body, but also in our daily lives. The 1^st century church shows this pattern, and I believe is both described and prescribed for the body to function as it should.

1Timothy 5:10- (speaking of widows, receiving them)Having a reputation for good works, and if she has brought up children, if she has shown hospitality to strangers, if she has washed the saints feet, if she has assisted those in distress, and if she has devoted herself to every good work.

The example here is not meant to shun those who are not known for these character traits, but to show the example of what would be expected of a lady in fellowship(the example is specific, but applies to men also), these traits being exhibited over the course of time while her husband was alive, and if she had children, that the expectation is not neglected. We all should strive to take up these roles, to follow the Christian model of hospitality and care for one another.

Hebrews 13:2- (strangers and visitors)Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by this some have entertained angels without knowing it.

When you invite into your home the poor, destitute, single moms, young men and women, and so many other people in various situations, our heart to please the Lord is evident by our desire to serve others, and in so doing, to serve God. Visiting Christians to your church, missionaries and the Lord's workers as they travel through are a blessing to the home, and it is such a blessing to know that no matter where you go, the body of Christ is there to love and care for you. If we are to be a family, we must act like family. We must be proactive in seeking out ways to serve, not taking this up only when no one else is doing this vital work in the body. We ought all to be known for our hospitality.

1Peter 4:9- be hospitable to one another without complaint.

This is not a burden, nor a difficulty, but a blessing to our own hearts to serve the saints, and bless the Lord's heart in loving His church. Not a chore or a necessary task to dread, but a wonderful blessing to be able to show practical love to one another.

Examples from the early church, a pattern we look to so often-

Acts 2:44 And all who believed were together and had all things in common.

Acts 2:45 And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need.

Acts 2:46 And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts,

Acts 2:47 praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.

The pattern of the early church is that of sharing, caring, spending time together both in prayer and study. This is for edifying the saints, and if we love each other as we ought to, this type of living will be the natural result. Make no mistake about it, if we know something to be good, and don't do it, it is sin!

Disruption and Destruction- by Kevan Fortier

This post was submitted by Kevan Fortier, a brother in Maine who meets at Lincoln County Assembly of God in Damariscotta, Maine. Kevan labors for the Lord in the Gospel through jail ministry in Knox County, Maine Feel free to post comments here, or email oneanothering@gmail.com and I will forward mail on to Kevan. Thanks to Kevan for this teaching, one that reminds us to follow the path the Lord leads us on, and not veer to the left or the right, simply focusing on the Lord Jesus and God's Holy Word to guide us.

Disruptive and Destructive / Matthew 7:13-14

You are walking down a path. A straight and narrow path, you are focused on the trail in front of you. All of a sudden, something takes your focus and attention away from what you are doing, and you change course. You walk out into the woods where something distracted your attention and focus.

Let’s consider Peter for a moment from the account in Matthew 14:22-33. Peter was focused on the Lord, his eyes were very clearly fixed on Jesus Christ; BUT the moment Peter looked away, what happened? Destruction was at hand. Peter would have died a certain death without the Lord Jesus Christ (as will all who do not now know Him if they should die apart from Him who alone is worthy and He alone is the only One who can save us).

Peter however; instantly recognizes that Jesus (alone) can save him from this, and he cries out ‘Lord, save me!’ (verse 30). Why didn’t he call out to the others who were in the boat? Peter knew that they could not help him, only (I will say it again) ONLY Jesus Christ can!!!

As you are walking into the woods after (I don’t know) whatever it is that took away from your attention, call it a squirrel; you catch your foot on a root, a branch, an uneven part of the earth, and break your ankle.

You were disrupted from the course, you lost your focus and drive, you deviated from the path and destruction was there. This is not the worst kind of destruction, but you sure did not plan on this happening.

Jesus said; “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it” (Matthew 7:13-14 NIV).

Let’s change the scenario just a little tiny bit; the same path, with signs, or arrows pointing which way it veers. You maintain a steady direction according to the arrows until you are distracted (again) something takes your attention off the path. You walk out into the woods after that same squirrel (or whatever it is that distracts you).

This time however you slip on a slippery slope. When you slip, you actually fall, but you notice that you do not just fall and stop; you continue to fall. The reason for this is because those arrows that were guiding you, keeping you on the path were actually also keeping you from harm. This path is along side a drop-off, and you are sliding down it to your doom. You will die.

What path are you on today? Where is your focus, attention, and drive? What does God desire for your life? Do you know that God has a plan and a purpose for you, and it does not include things that will harm you? (Jeremiah 29:11-14) His paths are straight (Proverbs 3:5-6) and narrow, we must not think that we can go off on our own and survive. His (God) ways are perfect. His guiding arrows along the path (of life) are His Word, the Bible, the Holy Spirit, which lives in all of us who are born again (John 3:1-9); these keep us on the right path, not to mention the gathering and fellowshipping with other believers in Jesus Christ! (Hebrews 10:25-25)

Consider this; A fly goes about his business all throughout the day looking for another piece of disgusting food from your trashcan, or whatever. Suddenly the fly observes a really neat and beautiful light; PURPLE light. He says to himself; “self, I will come right back to this path, but only after I go to that purple light and check it out for it is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen and something tasty must come from it”. So the fly goes to it and he DIES.

It is the same with us. Do not be deceived brothers and sisters, the devil does not put things in front of us that are repelling and vile and disgusting (by sight) to us. NO, he puts things on the path that entice us, and will ultimately destroy our souls if we are left to our own devices (1 Peter 5:8).

Let me offer this thought; there is a man who is married to a woman and has a family with her. One day they are out and about, and he notices another woman (who is not his wife), and he looks upon her in a lustful manner. Has he become disrupted from his course? I submit to you that he has; and is destruction awaiting him?

“You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matthew 5:28 NKJV), this is Jesus telling us this. In the Old Testament Job also says this; ‘I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl. For what is man’s lot from God above, his heritage from the Almighty on high? Is it not ruin for the wicked, disaster for those who do wrong? Does He not see my ways and count my every step? (Job 31:1-4 NIV).’ Sin is SIN is SIN, and it will disrupt you and destroy you! Make no mistake about it.

I am not writing to cast stones at anyone. I am a sinful man, how can I remove the speck from your eye, when there is a log in my own (Matthew 7:5)? I am not writing or saying these things to anyone specifically. The Lord Jesus Christ through His Holy Spirit and Sovereign Will is the One who will convict hearts, minds and souls and He will bring you to Himself. The Word of God and of all truth is convicting, consuming and will teach you the truth if you are willing to hear it and put it into your heart and live according to what it says.

These things I am talking about are to convict and convince you that we cannot be disrupted, by anything, for this will bring about our swift destruction. We must stay on the path that God sets us on!

The truth is, is that we (all of us) allow disruptions to continue to occur and take place; in our homes, our place of work, within our communities and elsewhere, we are all guilty of being disrupted and deviating from the straight and narrow path that God through His Son Jesus Christ has called us to; ALL of us.

Sadly, in this world today, we will have troubles (Jesus says be glad, for I have overcome the world – John 16:33). We allow (continuously) for disruptions to happen. However, if allowed to continue in this pattern of behavior, it will cost us.

Let’s look at it this way.

Can you see that God gave his Son to die for you, for all of us? For all who would call on Him by faith (Romans 10:9-13)- Jesus takes on the role of our redeemer. He took our (my) place of shame. Jesus took our (my) SIN and Disruption upon himself to save us (me) from it. Nobody else has that authority.

‘For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. For God did not send His Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through Him might be saved. He who believes in Him is not condemned; but he who does not believe is condemned already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. And this is the condemnation, that the light has come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.’ (John 3:16-19 NKJV)

JESUS CHRIST HAS THE SUPREME AUTHORITY!! Praise God! Jesus has taken away all of our sin and disruption through His sacrifice and death upon the cross, my cross, and your cross. He took my shame and forgave me when I accepted Him, and He will forgive and accept you as HIS own when you receive Him (John 1:12-13).

If we will only do away with the disruptions (sin) in our lives and live fully the way God intended, we shall not see destruction come upon us. There will be times of forgetfulness on our part; forgetting to do what God says; forgetting or failing to recognize God as the Supreme author and authority over our lives; forgetting to see the truth of His word and promises; however, if we submit ourselves to Him, and confess our sin before Him, He will forgive us our sin and cleanse us from our unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). This is one of His many wonderful promises to us.

There are some promises that we do not want to see however. God promises that all the vile, immoral, sexually impure, will not see life (eternal) but only see and taste death everlasting and eternal (Galatians 5:19-21 / Colossians 3:5-10,). Those who believe in the name of Jesus and confess Him as Lord and Savior (Romans 10:9) will live forever in heaven to the glory of God the Father through Jesus. Amen.

Let us not be slow in our obedience. The Living Word of God says this; “So, as the Holy Spirit says: “Today if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion” (Hebrews 3:7-8). Let us not be slow in our understanding of what is required of us by God the Father. Let us not be disrupted by the things of this life or of this world.

‘Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world – the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life – is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever’ (1 John 2:15-17 NKJV).

Let us not be slow in our response to the invitation of eternal life through Jesus Christ. Let us be diligent to walk on the straight and narrow path that leads to eternal and everlasting life that is only through Jesus Christ.

Let us avoid any and all disruptions that will lead us astray and into destruction, even the eternal destruction.

And the God of our Lord Jesus Christ will be with you and strengthen you for all things and all times in your life if you will only place your entire trust in Him, and His finished work on the cross for you. He died for us we should live for Him.

In Christ,
Kevan Fortier